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Fishing for puns, jokes, and other silliness

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Greywind
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Fishing for puns, jokes, and other silliness

<Split from Some Quick-and-Dirty Wrath of the Cosmos Thougths>

 

Leave the porpoises out of it.

kitmehsu
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Greywind wrote:

Leave the porpoises out of it.

Please don't fish for puns

Silverleaf
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This is neither the time not the plaice for sea-related puns.


Just assume I'm always doing that.

Damn it, Ronway!

Greywind
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There is always a time and place for fishing.

Pydro
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High noon, middle of the desert?


Civilized men are more discourteous than savages because they know they can be impolite without having their skulls split, as a general thing.
-Robert E. Howard, "The Tower of the Elephant"

Arcanist Lupus
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On the other hand, phishing should never be encouraged.

 

And if you only fish for very short periods of time, all you'll catch is microfiche.


"Do you not know that a man is not dead while his name is still spoken?"

- Terry Pratchett, Going Postal

Pydro
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Who needs fish when you have ghoti.


Civilized men are more discourteous than savages because they know they can be impolite without having their skulls split, as a general thing.
-Robert E. Howard, "The Tower of the Elephant"

Arcanist Lupus
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Give a man a fish, you feed him for a day.  Set a man on fish, and you feed him for the rest of his life.


"Do you not know that a man is not dead while his name is still spoken?"

- Terry Pratchett, Going Postal

Silverleaf
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Give a man a fish, and he can eat for a day. Give a fish a man, and he can eat for weeks!*

 

 

*Assuming an appropriately large man and an appropriately small fish. Because explaining jokes makes them funnier.


Just assume I'm always doing that.

Damn it, Ronway!

Arcanist Lupus
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Give a whale a man, and he'll end up with a throat.  But you must particularly remember the suspenders!


"Do you not know that a man is not dead while his name is still spoken?"

- Terry Pratchett, Going Postal

Silverleaf
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I see we got split from the main fish.


Just assume I'm always doing that.

Damn it, Ronway!

Arcanist Lupus
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This makes me very... 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

(Octo)pissed off.  Ha!  You thought I was going to say 'Crabby', didn't you!


"Do you not know that a man is not dead while his name is still spoken?"

- Terry Pratchett, Going Postal

Silverleaf
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Silverleaf wrote:

I see we got split from the main fish.

The mods are very effishient like that.


Just assume I'm always doing that.

Damn it, Ronway!

Killswitch
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Something fishy is going on here. On a very grand scale. Don't think I don't sea what's going on in here.


Steam Username: General Specific

You gotta know when to hold 'em,
Know when to fold 'em,
Know when to hold fast
And when to turn loose!

Silverleaf
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These pun threads are a ray of light in my otherwise dreary existence.


Just assume I'm always doing that.

Damn it, Ronway!

Arcanist Lupus
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Silverleaf wrote:

These pun threads are a ray of light in my otherwise dreary existence.

Oh, angling for the subtle puns, are we?


"Do you not know that a man is not dead while his name is still spoken?"

- Terry Pratchett, Going Postal

Pydro
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Silverleaf wrote:

These pun threads are a STING ray of light in my otherwise dreary existence.

Fixed that for you


Civilized men are more discourteous than savages because they know they can be impolite without having their skulls split, as a general thing.
-Robert E. Howard, "The Tower of the Elephant"

Silverleaf
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Pydro wrote:
Silverleaf wrote:
These pun threads are a STING ray of light in my otherwise dreary existence.

Fixed that for you

Not all rays are stingrays, y'know, and I like my puns subtle. Still, it's fun to discus fish!


Just assume I'm always doing that.

Damn it, Ronway!

Pydro
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Also fun to eat fish.


Civilized men are more discourteous than savages because they know they can be impolite without having their skulls split, as a general thing.
-Robert E. Howard, "The Tower of the Elephant"

Arcanist Lupus
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And even more fun to cat fish!


"Do you not know that a man is not dead while his name is still spoken?"

- Terry Pratchett, Going Postal

phantaskippy
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What do you call a fish with no eyes?

Arcanist Lupus
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No eye-deer!

 

 

Oh wait.  Wrong joke.


"Do you not know that a man is not dead while his name is still spoken?"

- Terry Pratchett, Going Postal

Silverleaf
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phantaskippy wrote:

What do you call a fish with no eyes?

Visually impaired?


Just assume I'm always doing that.

Damn it, Ronway!

kitmehsu
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phantaskippy wrote:

What do you call a fish with no eyes?

Well you wouldn't call them a See bass.

Pydro
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Fsh


Civilized men are more discourteous than savages because they know they can be impolite without having their skulls split, as a general thing.
-Robert E. Howard, "The Tower of the Elephant"

Pydro
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What do you call a cow that can't give milk?


Civilized men are more discourteous than savages because they know they can be impolite without having their skulls split, as a general thing.
-Robert E. Howard, "The Tower of the Elephant"

phantaskippy
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Pydro wrote:

Fsh

Winner!

Pydro wrote:

What do you call a cow that can't give milk?

A Milkless non-Aquatic interloper that needs to find its own thread.

Talk about your Udder Failures.

Silverleaf
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Pydro wrote:

What do you call a cow that can't give milk?

A cow?


Just assume I'm always doing that.

Damn it, Ronway!

Pydro
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phantaskippy wrote:

Talk about your Udder Failures.

Winner!


Civilized men are more discourteous than savages because they know they can be impolite without having their skulls split, as a general thing.
-Robert E. Howard, "The Tower of the Elephant"

Silverleaf
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Oh my Cod. Aren't you guys fin-ished yet?


Just assume I'm always doing that.

Damn it, Ronway!

phantaskippy
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Silverleaf wrote:

 

Pydro wrote:
What do you call a cow that can't give milk?

 

A cow?

It's spelled cow, but it's pronounced. . .

Arcanist Lupus
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"Do you not know that a man is not dead while his name is still spoken?"

- Terry Pratchett, Going Postal

Pydro
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Hehe


Civilized men are more discourteous than savages because they know they can be impolite without having their skulls split, as a general thing.
-Robert E. Howard, "The Tower of the Elephant"

phantaskippy
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Funny joke, that is 1.

Silverleaf
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I want to share a secret.

I sing in choirs, and am often asked to sing religious music. I'm cool with this despite my atheism, since I figure pop singers aren't usually singing literal personal truth either. I'm pretty sure that Kylie Minogue has never been murdered by Nick Cage. Acting is part of singing.

But I sometimes amuse myself by substituting "cod" for "God". No one can tell, and it pleases me in an extremely childish way.

Doesnt really work in Latin though.

 


Just assume I'm always doing that.

Damn it, Ronway!

Silverleaf
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phantaskippy wrote:
Silverleaf wrote:
 Pydro wrote:
What do you call a cow that can't give milk? 

A cow?

It's spelled cow, but it's pronounced. . .

Throat-warbler Mangrove.


Just assume I'm always doing that.

Damn it, Ronway!

Arcanist Lupus
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Silverleaf wrote:

I want to share a secret.I sing in choirs, and am often asked to sing religious music. I'm cool with this despite my atheism, since I figure pop singers aren't usually singing literal personal truth either. I'm pretty sure that Kylie Minogue has never been murdered by Nick Cage. Acting is part of singing.But I sometimes amuse myself by substituting "cod" for "God". No one can tell, and it pleases me in an extremely childish way.Doesnt really work in Latin though. 


"Do you not know that a man is not dead while his name is still spoken?"

- Terry Pratchett, Going Postal

Silverleaf
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Just assume I'm always doing that.

Damn it, Ronway!

phantaskippy
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Silverleaf wrote:

 

phantaskippy wrote:
Silverleaf wrote:
 Pydro wrote:
What do you call a cow that can't give milk? 

 

A cow?

It's spelled cow, but it's pronounced. . .

Throat-warbler Mangrove.

This joke never grows old.  Quite often someone says something serious and I laugh, and they have no clue it's because I'm imagining this joke.

Silverleaf
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phantaskippy wrote:
Silverleaf wrote:
 phantaskippy wrote:
Silverleaf wrote:
 Pydro wrote:
What do you call a cow that can't give milk?  

A cow?

It's spelled cow, but it's pronounced. . .

Throat-warbler Mangrove.

This joke never grows old.  Quite often someone says something serious and I laugh, and they have no clue it's because I'm imagining this joke.

I know, I love this one. Did I ever tell you I met Michael Palin?


Just assume I'm always doing that.

Damn it, Ronway!

Arcanist Lupus
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Silverleaf wrote:

 

phantaskippy wrote:
Silverleaf wrote:
 phantaskippy wrote:
Silverleaf wrote:
 Pydro wrote:
What do you call a cow that can't give milk?  

 

A cow?

It's spelled cow, but it's pronounced. . .

Throat-warbler Mangrove.

This joke never grows old.  Quite often someone says something serious and I laugh, and they have no clue it's because I'm imagining this joke.

I know, I love this one. Did I ever tell you I met Michael Palin?

I'm not familiar with this joke.  Could you explain it to me, as a sacrifice to the ziggurat?

"Do you not know that a man is not dead while his name is still spoken?"

- Terry Pratchett, Going Postal

phantaskippy
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I loved Micheal Palin's around the world in 80 days, that was a great show.  How did you meet him?

Silverleaf
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Not terribly exciting, it was at a book signing. He's a really nice guy.

I'm just unnecessarily proud to have shaken the hand of one of the Pythons. Incidentally he was born about 10 miles away from my home town.

I'm also boastful that I've had a drink with Craig Charles (Lister from Red Dwarf), who signed my breast (his idea). Also a nice guy, very funny and friendly.


Just assume I'm always doing that.

Damn it, Ronway!

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My dad's friend and bandmate wrote Every Sperm is Sacred...


“You gotta have blue hair."
-Reckless